According to Hofmann: An honest self-assessment
There are points in a person鈥檚 life where they have to stop what they鈥檙e doing and perform a self-assessment of their current situation.
It鈥檚 a vital step to see where you are in your life and what life choices brought you to that particular point. It鈥檚 a realignment of one鈥檚 point of view to offer a new and different perspective as a benefit to their current and future mental wellbeing.
That鈥檚 what I was hoping a Marvin Gaye impersonator and British zookeepers would have done after I had read a story about a zoo having the impersonator croon love songs to the zoo鈥檚 habitat of monkeys.
According to the UK Daily Mail, staff at the Trentham Monkey Forest in Stafford invited singer Dave Largie to perform late soul legend Marvin Gaye鈥檚 songs to a habitat of Barbary macaques.
Gaye鈥檚 velvet-smooth chart toppers include 鈥淟et鈥檚 Get it On,鈥� 鈥淪exual Healing,鈥� 鈥淐ome Get to This鈥� and 鈥淭he Main Theme to 鈥楾rouble Man'鈥� (that one was requested by the Armadillo habitat next door, for some reason).
The idea was to get the female Barbary macaques in the mood and show some affection toward the males.
That being said, I can鈥檛 help but to wonder if the impersonator conducted a self-assessment of his life while belting out a rendition of 鈥淢ercy Mercy Me.鈥�
I鈥檝e been a Marvin Gaye impersonator for 23 years. I know all the songs, I got the voice down, got the look down, got the moves down 鈥� I got the soul down! Yet, here I am, singing to a bunch of apes to mate in captivity. I should have been a plumber, but I just had to be in the spotlight, didn鈥檛 I? I should have at least been paid for this gig.
I imagine he would also be hoping that the monkeys like the performance because getting drinks and napkins thrown at you in a nightclub is nothing compared to what an agitated monkey would throw.
The zookeeper could have had a similar reflection on life decisions.
Six years of hard studying to earn my bachelor鈥檚 in zoology, interning at some of the biggest zoos in England and working my way up the ladder here, and what do I do with all that knowledge of the animal kingdom? I have someone singing to animals! Oh well, at least we鈥檙e not paying for this.
Also, somewhere in the realm of the Great Beyond, I鈥檓 sure the spirit of Marvin Gaye himself was looking at what happened and had some thoughts of his own.
Oh, no鈥o鈥o, no, no, no, no, nooooooo!
I can make fun of this situation all day long, but I have to say that at least some thought went into the zoo-lovin鈥� experiment.
For example, Marvin Gaye鈥檚 鈥淟et鈥檚 Get it On鈥� is the international musical sign (or notes) that things are going to get hot and heavy. Why the song is used in mainstream commercials for peanut-butter cups and auto insurance is beyond me. Sometimes I wonder if I have to have children shield their eyes from the TV screen.
Sure, I think having an impersonator coming in is taking it a bit too far, but if they would have had a Twisted Sister tribute band come in and sing 鈥淲e鈥檙e Not Gonna Take It,鈥� you鈥檇 have an animal mutiny on your hands. I think that鈥檚 how the monkeys evolved from man in the 鈥淧lanet of the Apes鈥� movies.
A nice addition to the story is the fact that the Barbary macaques are considered an endangered species, and following the performance, the article reports that keepers at the zoo said they witnessed some 鈥渓ovey dovey鈥� action with the macaques.
The article goes on to state that zookeepers expect to discover whether the visit had any effect on the monkeys when birthing season arrives in late spring or early summer.
That being said, perhaps the thoughts and self-assessment going through the heads of those involved can be more of a remarkable pride in the accomplishment of assisting in the ongoing survival of a species.
On the other hand (or monkey鈥檚 paw, in this case) if Earth becomes a planet where apes evolve from man because of this meddling with nature, then they should very well be ashamed.
According to Hofmann is written by staff reporter Mark Hofmann of Rostraver Township. His books, 鈥淕ood Mourning! A Guide to Biting the Big One 鈥� and Dying, Too鈥� and 鈥淪tupid Brain,鈥� are available on Amazon.com.