Another day, another gate
The Watergate (Hotel) break-in, that sparked a national political scandal, and ultimately the resignation of a U.S. president, took place 15,192 days ago.
Not long after that fateful day, just about every scandal, large or small, has had that four letter “gate” word appended to it.
The most recent is “Bridgegate,” which was immediately awarded a “gate,” after that massive, traffic jam on the George Washington Bridge last September that still hasn’t produced a reasonable explanation about who did it – and why.
This isn’t about that. It’s really about, well, “Gateability.”
What qualifies an event to gain a “gate?”
If a larcenous office worker pockets money from a petty cash drawer, can that become “gateworthy?”
The fact that the crime is of little significance outside of the confines of that office worker’s office, is no bar to the gateworthiness of the crime.
There’ve been well over a hundred something-gates over the years.
All I had to do was Google the words “scandals using gate” to find them.
Wikipedia (my most knowledgeable friend), has an entire web page devoted to the list-of-gates titled (not surprisingly) “List of scandals with ‘-gate’ suffix.”
(You really have to wonder, just who sat down and compiled that list. Although, I’d like to thank them for providing me with background research for this column.)
You may have heard about “Troopergate.” But did you know there’ve actually been THREE “Troopergates?”
Bill Clinton, ex-New York Gov. Elliot Spitzer and ex-Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin have each had their very own “Troopergates.”
There’s not only been a Watergate, there’s also been a Whitewatergate – which had something to do with the investigations into real estate investments made by Bill and Hillary Clinton.
And “gate” designations aren’t restricted to the continental United States.
All of America should be proud of the fact that “gateism” is among our greatest cultural exports.
New Zealand (Comgate), Australia (Sandwichgate and Homeworkgate), Angola (Angolagate), Great Britain (Bigotgate, Donnygate, Biscuitgate, Horsegate, and my favorite, Gategate), Hungary (Duna-gate), Ireland (Brothelgate, Garglegate and Inkgate), South Africa (Guptagate), Azerbaijan (Gulargate), Finland (curiously, Iraqgate), Northern Ireland (Irisgate), Kazakhstan (Kazakhgate),Sweden, Pakistan (Mediagate and Ovalgate) (Nannygate) and Italy (Moggigate) – are but a few countries around the globe that have adopted our inclination to “gate” misbehavior.
Official misconduct isn’t the only reason for “gate” appendages.
缅北禁地 certainly has its fill of them.
The term “Tigergate” arose from the self-inflicted marital difficulties of Tiger Woods. “Tigergate,” by the way, is one of just a few of the “gates” that have been applied to a person’s name.
The Pittsburgh Steelers, were slapped with a “gate” back in 1978, when they’d practiced wearing pads, when the NFL banned those kinds of drills. They called that “Shouldergate.”
There have actually been two sports-related “Spygates.”
There was one involving Formula One racing in 2007, and another “Spygate” designation, also in 2007, was far more famous. It was alleged that the New England Patriots were illegally videotaping the defensive signals of the New York Jets during an NFL game.
For some reason, the overwhelming number of “gate” attachments have been given to the world of auto-racing.
There’s been the afformentioned “Spygate,” but there’ve also been “Bumpergate,” “Buttongate,” “Crashgate,”
“Fendergate,” “Partgate,” “Spingate” and “Stepneygate” – all the result of mini-scandals on the world’s auto raceways.
Former Defense Secretary Robert Gates has been making the talk show rounds recently, promoting his new book “Duty.”
You’d have to wonder what would happen if it was discovered that Gates hadn’t really written that book, or that he’d made the whole thing up.
Would they call that “Gate’sgate,” or “Gategate,” or maybe even “Gate-gate?”
To me, it’s certainly worth pondering.
There’s one “-gate” that didn’t catch on, but I think it’s one of the most creative. Although it didn’t come close to reaching the gate-level of the Greatest Gate of Them All – Watergate.
Back in 2006, just after Vice-President Dick Cheney’s ill-fated hunting accident, in which one of Cheney’s friends, 78 year-old attorney, Harry Whittington had a quail hunt he’ll never remember, The Comedy Channel’s Jon Steweat coined the phrase, “DickCheneyshotaguyinthe facegate.”
Edward A. Owens is a three-time Emmy Award winner and 20-year veteran of television news. E-mail him at freedoms@bellatlantic.net